Life, Day by Day

"Death comes like a thief in the night"..."we all live on borrowed time"..."it's the best way to go"..."she is in a better place"... "you now have another angel in heaven"..."life goes on". All those words are true, but they do not lessen the pain...they do not take away the grief...they do not make the tears stop...they cannot remove the sadness brought about by the sudden loss of a loved one.

I met Pocholo when we were both enrolled in a pre-med course in La Salle Bacolod. He eventually changed course and became a lawyer while I plodded on to become a doctor. I only stayed for 2 years in La Salle Bacolod but that was enough to create a lasting friendship.  Thinking back, he was not your typical teenager...although I found him both serious and funny, Philip as we called him then was also very responsible, caring and helpful.  On hindsight, he was very protective towards all of us that he seemed to be older and more mature. In fact it is only now that I learn that he is just one month older than I am. I have many good memories of  Philip "Pocholo" Dabao as Philip and later as Pocholo.  He became Pocholo or Pochoy to me, 25 years later when I attended the homecoming in La Salle when he was the alumni president. As time went on, I would see him rarely...but every time we did, we always have a short chat catching up on each other's lives. I have this one special m

Most of us in our adult life have experienced losing someone we love...family, a friend, a lover...whether the loss is due to separation or death, it really doesn't matter because the pain, the hurt, the loss is almost the same, the difference is in how long you grieve over the loss. This past week, we had 2 deaths in our extended family. Both were in their twilight years and if we were to be pragmatic about it, their passing should really be more of a reward and a celebration of a life well lived. Listening to the short sermons during the daily masses for Tito Doring and the stories and sharings gave me new insights to reflect on about life and death. I wrote about life being short the weekend before he died and this phrase hold more meaning to me now more than ever. The loss brought about by death reminds me not to waste time on the ifs and buts...that opportunity once lost seldom comes back. A close cousin said during the memorial service that most of us spend our lives chasing

Last Friday, 2 people close to me passed away. One has been sick since the beginning of the year while the other was a family friend and co-volunteer in the Diocesan Lay Formation Center. Both deaths although not surprising were still unexpected...at least not as soon as this. I was in church attending a wedding as a primary sponsor when I got the text message from my Mom regarding Tito Nacing...my feeling upon getting the news was what a good way to die...no fuss, no long agonies...it's typical of him. He has had a few close calls before, so I guess this time was the right time. The other death was not a shock but the news gave me a lump in the throat. I got home from the wedding reception really tired and did not bother to check the messages on my cellphone. I was told that our administrative officer called earlier in the afternoon but left no message. I sat down to watch TV and after a few minutes decided to take a bath...I cleaned up my bag and saw the message..."Patay